At a loss

I don’t even know what to do with myself anymore. I’m super depressed on the inside and completely antisocial on the outside. I hold most people in contempt, only rarely finding someone that I actually like or want to have anything to do with. Even the people I like aren’t doing it for me anymore […]

White trash Dr. Phil

It’s is amazing to me how many experts I have out there about my life, who I am and what I do. It would appear that there are at least 5 and maybe more people who know more about me then I do about myself. All the answers to all of my problems, advice on […]

Unrealistic Expectations

I’ve learned in my 42 years of chaos that you can’t expect people to be good to you just cause you’re good to them. You can’t count on much of anything anymore. It used to be, a person word meant something to them. I grew up with the delusion that a man was only as […]

When is enough, enough?

There’s gotta be a point where you’re just like you know what? Fuck it. I’m done. I’m out. And there has been many. But I quit hard as fuck. I do everything hard as fuck. Which includes among many, loving hard. I’m not very good at it but I go hard as fuck. If I […]

Damn it feels good to be a gangster

And it does. It’s like that movie Goodfellas in the beginning when the dude say, “As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster”. I am not sure if I was just born this way because both of my parents besides a little recreational drug use, were and are very […]

Tomorrow

I haven’t wrote on here in a minute. I’m not sure why really. I mean I know but it’s retarded so whatever. I’m a pretty emotional guy even though I do a good job of bottling it up or pushing it under the rug so I just come off looking like an asshole instead of […]

Stuck in a rut?

Write something. Anything. Get out of your head. Stop doing whatever it is that I’m doing. Change the frequency, shift the vibration. As my life spins faster and more out of control, I notice the little things more frequently and I think about the illusion of time. Sometimes it feels like its passing so fast, […]

Fuck

Well, R.I.P jeep. You will be missed dearly. We had a little accident the other day on I-5 headed north through Canyonville Oregon. Apparently I’m retarded and so I decided to see if I could die, rolling my poor little jeep 5 times at 90 mph. With no seatbelt. Still can’t die. Although apparently I’m […]

Connection

My homeboy told me that my plants will never reach their full potential because I have them potted and not planted in the earth. He’s not a hippie and he’s not some tree hugger or some naturalistic weirdo. Dudes a straight criminal, pretty gangster type motherfucker. I mean the dude taught me how to pick […]

Our future

If the way that we fix the future is through our youth then I got the feeling that we are fucked. The youth of our nation are a bunch of soft ass, entitled, disrespectful, little fucks. So unsure of themselves that they don’t even know which gender to identify with, inventing new genders just for […]