Nihilism

I’m a nihilist. I believe in science (to a certain extent), I believe that everything is energy, everything is just atoms firing upon each other. Energy can not be created and it can’t be destroyed. There was no beginning, there will be no end. It’s just an infinite loop, around and around and around. Meaning we have all done this before, hundreds, millions, an infinite number of times. We’ve all met before, this isn’t our first dance and it won’t be our last. We’ve done this countless times it’s just sometimes I’m the chick, or maybe a bird, shit maybe a pop can. But regardless this has all happened before, granted at times with different results but a repeat none the less. In that sense, if this is all just a loop and we are destined to do it over and over, then nothing truly matters. If we’re all just energy and we can’t be destroyed then there is no death, shit or life for that matter. Life is just an exercise in futility. Kinda like that movie groundhogs day. So with that in mind the argument that nothing really does matter holds some substance. If we can’t really die and in fact aren’t actually really living then everything that you do is pointless and mundane. It’s importance only yours, or possibly society’s but holding no importance to the bigger picture. There is no secret to life, no meaning. We are just meat puppets feeding the machine. It’s only the meat puppet that “dies” at which point you flash onto the next one, be it another human or maybe an animal or possibly even an inanimate objet like a pop can or a baby diaper. I wholeheartedly believe this, feeling it’s true deep in my core, and believing this at times allows me liberties I might not have with a different belief system. I helps me not to fear pretty much anything. It assures me that nobody dies so I’ll never actually be without then, maybe them as a person but never as an energy, they will always be there, somewhere. It also can breed some depression because people want to believe that the shit they do has meaning, that there was a reason that all the rotten things they survived happened for a reason. Like Gods plan. Hahaha. There is no god there is only us which when we come together is absolutely god-like. But as far as some dude sitting on a cloud, scrolling through Facebook damning people to hell for scrolling past some dead babies? Get real. I’m not sure if it is worse that you believe that shit or that you want to believe that shit. Vengeful gods smoking civilizations for minor infractions, the human race founded on incest over and over. Fear and the inability to do anything without the help of God their selling ports. Making you seem small and inadequate. Convinced that you can only be magic through you relationship with God. Organized religion is a control factor. It’s a crutch. A tool to control and manipulate. The same goes for society, money, life, it is all just one big control factor. Smoke and mirrors to distract you from the truth. So this is part 1 of a 2 part blog. This shit is getting kind of long winded and I still got a ways to go. So part to is about how because of the fact that nothing matters, that makes this moment right now the moment you’re experiencing at this exact moment is actually the only thing that truly matters. More from the delusions of Jason the Destroyer at a later date. Be warned.